Funky rockabilly?

• Dress: Maurices
• Belt: Maurices (came with the dress)
• Socks: Target
• Shoes: Converse via Target (men's department, buy)

My wife and I had some disagreement over this outfit. My wife liked it less than I did, but I wasn't 100% happy with it either, however it's growing on me over time. I actually almost didn't post it, but its always fun to see what everyone else thinks! I wish this separates instead of a dress as well, but I do think its still fun as it is. Normally I also would have worn shoes with a heel, but I recently bought these sneakers, and I really wanted to pair them with a skirt or a dress. (Edit: eek is an awesome blogger who occasionally makes great use of Converse sneakers in her outfits, and I I realized I omitted a link to her blog!)

I also have a question to answer today, the awesome Genevieve from sandbox romance asked: Just out of curiosity, do you ever experiment with wearing more "gender neutral" clothing in public? I have to confess; I have no idea what that would mean for men!

I love to do small experiments with the clothes I'm willing to wear in public, and over time, I have slowly expanded the list of things I'm comfortable wearing. Most of those items are clothes labeled for women though. However, the first image that jumps to mind when thinking about "gender neutral" clothing are some of those horrible (and not so horrible) grade B sci-fi movies where everyone is wearing muted pastel colored jumpsuits. In all fairness, there are some fashion forward sci-fi movies like The Fifth Element (er, but then again how many sci-fi movies can get Jean-Paul Gaultier to design their costumes?)

Thankfully this is a blog post, not a research paper, so I can do some vacuous uncited handwaving :). I recall reading several writers who have pointed out that "unisex" styling almost always defaults to "masculine" styles, and is almost always "functional" (in contrast to "stylish"). When I try to think of "feminine" unisex styles its difficult. For instance, I guess the closest thing to a gender neutral "skirt" that comes to mind is a Utilikilt. However, I don't own one, and where I live I have the vague feeling a Utilikilt might draw more attention than "simple" crossdressing. (Interestingly, I do know some male hikers that prefer kilts to other lower body garments.) Historically, leggings, tunics, and togas all seem to have been fairly gender neutral at some point, and even high heels were once worn by males. Well, actually I suppose toga's still sometimes count as "gender neutral" party wear on college campuses.

In discussing some of this with friends who live in more metropolitan areas, I am aware that its more common and acceptable to see guys wearing skinny jeans, deeper V-necks, and other items that would be labeled more "feminine". Certainly some visions of "gender neutral" seem to be more androgynous, in contrast to more "masculine" versions. I also think its interesting to think about the role of homophobia plays for some males in deciding whether certain articles of clothing are too "feminine".

Some of the things I have incorporated into my daily rotation include women's jeans from a medium to a dark wash. Most of them are boot cut, although a couple of pairs have more flare. All the jeans are more fitted through the thigh though. I also have some women's oxfords and women's sneakers I wear on a regular basis out and about. My hoodie is from the women's department, and it has more fitted sleeves and a double zipper. My gloves (coming soon in a post!) and my new winter coat are from the women's department. I don't know if any of this counts as "gender neutral" though. I would like to incorporate more items into my daily wear though, but I admit it, I get really self conscious the more things I wear out. In my ideal world though, I would want to wear everything I post on this blog out, and it count as "gender neutral".

As always, I love answering questions, so feel free to ask away in comments or via email, and I already have another question from blog buddy Pamela to answer in my next post! (And I always tag posts like this with q and a.) Of course my amazing wife took the pictures for today's post.

Its too cold for this outfit.

• Cami: Cato (previously)
• Cardigan: Old Navy (previously)
• Skirt: Maurices (previously)
• Shoes: Gabriella Rocha via Zappos (buy)
• Pantyhose: Just My Size via Walmart

A while back, I saw Ashley of Ashley Getting Dressed post a really cute outfit. It didn't take me long to realize that one of my favorite skirts was really similar to hers, and that I could recreate a very similar outfit for myself. As an added bonus, I realized it would make a great outfit for the blog debut of these camel colored T-strap pumps. And those white blurs in the last two pictures are not a camera malfunction, they're snow! I hope everyone had a great weekend, and of course today's pictures were taken by my beautiful wife.

Long skirt and no jacket.

• Top: JC Penney (previously)
• Belt: Torrid (previously)
• Skirt: Cato
• Boots: Torrid
• Bracelets: Torrid (previously)

This is my only long skirt, and I bought it a while back because I wanted to try a longer skirt, but I'm never sure how to style it. The fabric is pretty heavy and its really warm, which is great when its below freezing outside, but that also makes it a fall/winter piece only. Unfortunately, this will be the one and only appearance of these boots on this blog. I've given them several chances to get broken in, but every time I wear them they squeeze too tight in the middle of my foot, which I think is a pretty weird way to not fit. They left my feet hurting after wearing them a relatively short time. I have 5" heels that hurt less than these boots. But enough with the negatives. I like how this outfit turned out, and I think the skirt worked really well, and I have plenty of other shoes that will work just as well with this.

I'm still behind on all kinds of things, but maybe I can get caught up on my blogs this weekend! This weekend we also have our first (and so far only) holiday party to go to. I won't be wearing anything I would post here, but that's okay, it should still be a lot of fun! And I really hope everyone has a great weekend!

Just as a reminder, I always enjoy answering question, so definitely feel free to ask away. And of course, as usual my magnificent wife took the pictures today.

Orange and purple.

• Top: Cato
• Cami: Cato
• Vest: Maurices (buy it)
• Skirt: Isaac Mizrahi for Target
• Purple Tights: JC Penney (previously)
• Boots: Target
• Bracelet: Torrid (previously)

I frequently associate orange and purple with Halloween, but when I put this outfit together, I was thinking they really work great for fall in general. I was also trying to break my neutral heavy rut. Of course, its cold like winter here, so maybe its not really time for a "fall" outfit anymore, and this was all just wishful thinking on my part. I know the short sleeves were wishful thinking, but I was indoors the whole time I wore this outfit, with no intent to go outside.

I have another question to answer today. This one is from the fabulous Pamela of Call Me Ishmael: Where do you most want to go dressed as a woman? For what occasion? I think you mentioned something about a wedding or ball before. Anything else?

What I really want is to get dressed in the morning without having to consider the gender of my clothes, and just go about my day normally. As it stands, I'm pretty sure that's not realistic most days, but I do feel like I'm close to a place where I can go out and about some of the time. It just takes some advance planning and preparation. However, there are some situations where I frequently find myself wishing I could wear an outfit I would post here. And since that's what Pamela asked, here is a list of those places in no particular order.

• I mentioned this one previously. I would like to wear a nice formal dress to a formal event. Maybe its because I remember all the formals, proms, and dances I went to while I was in school where I was often jealous of all the pretty dresses. One day, I would really like to get dressed to the nines in formal wear and go to really swank event or dance.
• This one is related to the previous one, but since I joked about it in the other post, I thought I would expand on it. I have always enjoyed weddings, and while I had a close male friend ask me to be a groomsman once, I have sometimes thought it would be really special if one of my close female friends ever asked me to be a bridesmaid. (And then my next thought is usually to ask myself what would a male bridesmaid be called?). Of course, this would probably be a horrible idea, and weddings should be all about the couple, but I like the idea of being there for my friends on their special day. Also, I have a long and highly qualified resume documenting my skills at extreme car decoration during the reception. Okay, maybe that last one isn't helping my argument! :) (Hehe, it also doesn't help that the idea of male bridesmaids shows up in pop culture occasionally, like here and here!)
• I also like the idea of going dressed up to informal parties and other social events with friends. This is actually something that I am getting the opportunity to do now, since I have a circle of friends who are accepting of how I like to dress. Its not like there are opportunities on an extremely regular basis, and most of our friends live one city over from us, but next year is looking up on this count.
• I'm sure to no one's great surprise, shopping is high on the list too. Especially the idea of making a real day of it with some friends, and going to a city with lots of great shopping options (and preferably reasonably far away from home for anonymity reasons...). Of course, this one is as much limited by budget as other concerns, so I guess I need to start saving up for it. :)
• A "(Mostly) Girls Night Out". The idea of getting dressed up and going out with small group of close friends to a nice restaurant, followed by a movie, play, or some other fun and/or cultural event or even a nice club. I'm not sure if this counts as irony, but I wouldn't actually want to exclude any gender from this sort of event. Earlier this year, some friends had a tea party and hosted a Mary Kay consultant during the tea. Afterward we all went to a restaurant and then to play pool. The evening was actually completely mixed gender. Okay, well, I was the only guy who elected to go to the Mary Kay part (the other guys watched a movie in a different part of the house), and I ended up changing before we went out for the rest of the evening. So I'm including this one because doing more things like this appeals to me, especially the part where I don't change clothes halfway through.
• I really enjoy office styles a lot, and so the opportunity to conduct business dressed up really appeals to me as well.
• When I was in college, a friend of mine showed up to class one day in a 3 piece suit. We asked him what the occasion was, to which he deftly responded, "Laundry Day." And so the last "place" it something I have probably mentioned before as well. Some days, I just want to get up and dress up for what many would say is "no reason at all". I do think there is a reason though. I want to dress up for myself, and when someone asks why, I don't want to feel embarrassed that I just wanted to look fabulous, and hide behind being out of "regular" clothes. (In all fairness to my friend, he was, in fact, completely out of other clean clothes. I guess doing your own laundry is a life skill too frequently learned in college.)

And of course more questions are always welcome, so definitely feel free to post more. I will always try my best to answer them. This week has been mildly crazy as well, so I must apologize for the lack of posts and being behind in general. And of course today's pictures were taken by my lovely wife.

Black and khaki.

• Sweater: Target (previously)
• Skirt: Old Navy
• Scarf: Maurices (previously)
• Tights: Lane Bryant
• Boots: Payless (previously)

Black with a khaki skirt has always been a classic combination in my mind, and when I saw eek's post the other day, I realized I hadn't posted a combo like that on here before. Edit: I also realized I was inspired by this outfit Hope posted a while back! And although I was keeping it simple with this outfit, I did want to add this scarf to add a little extra pop to the outfit. (And I tied it like this in case anyone is curious) And I realize I have yet again gone with a heavy neutral palette. I definitely need to remember to bring some more color into my winter wardrobe. I guess there's always tomorrow.

I also thought I would remind everyone that I love answering questions. I also realized that since I have attracted some new readers recently (Welcome everyone!), and also just for anyone who hasn't noticed this, that I always try to tag posts where I answer questions with "q and a". I also received a question from Thrifty Momma on my last post: Not sure if you addressed this but I wanted to say at least you are being honest with your wife!! and I was wondering if you two share clothing and give each other tips?

My wife takes the pictures, reads the blog, and reads the comments. So not only is she aware, she is also a (mostly!) willing participant in my interest in fashion, and that is hopefully clear to anyone reading as well. And for all of her help and acceptance, I'm profoundly grateful. But I do want to address the honesty aspect, since I'm pretty sure I haven't discussed it before. My wife is my best friend, and I always try to be honest with her about everything. The only secrets I try to keep are presents and surprises.

My wife was made aware of my interest while we were just dating, and it was not an easy discussion. To make matters more complicated, at the time I did not think my interest was morally acceptable, so I certainly didn't ask her to think it was okay. It wasn't the easiest thing for her to deal with then as well. It has not been an easy road reaching acceptance for either of us. It wasn't until shortly after our marriage that we both reached a productive level of acceptance, and even still, I have times that I struggle with it. The thing is, I do think its mostly a positive part of our lives now, and fashion is a fun creative outlet for me, and we both accept this. Starting this blog has opened up a safe avenue for me to find other people that share my interest in fashion who also find what I'm doing acceptable. My wife has been thrilled at the response this blog has received, and its definitely helped both of us out a lot.

I have discussed before that we do not share clothes. Our clothing and shoe sizes are just too different for that to work. We do occasionally share accessories though, and my wife has borrowed one of my purses before. Of the two of us, I think I enjoy fashion and shopping more, but we do help each other put together outfits and shop for clothes, and I have picked out entire outfits for my wife on a few occasions at her request. :)

And of course today's pictures were taken by my awesome wife.

Little brown dress.

• Dress: Target
• Belt: Torrid (previously, buy it)
• Boots: Torrid (previously)
• Leggings: Maurices (previously)
• Cardigan: Maurices (buy it)

Whatever you can say about this outfit, I'll say this: it was comfortable. I felt so great and comfortable and warm that I didn't want to take it off. For the first part of the day I was freezing, and so when I finally got to the point I could change, I knew I wanted to wear this cardigan. And unfortunately for outfit pictures my wife didn't get home until after dark. But it still worked out I think.

And I feel like I need to give some credit for this outfit and some of my posing as well. I'm pretty sure I was inspired by Ashley from Free Honey both in my posing (and probably a bit of my wife's posing too) and styling from this post (and probably some others as well). Also I probably borrowed a bit from Fashion Momma's post here too. I might have borrowed more inspiration, but its not coming to mind, so if I left anyone out, let me know! And of course my amazing wife took today's pictures.

Hair and makeup.

• Top: Maurices
• City Shorts: Maurices
• Boots: Payless (previously)
• Pantyhose: Just My Size via Walmart
• Necklace: Maurices (previously)
• Bracelet: Torrid (previously)

I felt really great in this outfit, but there are some things I'm not sure about. This button down is a little on the bulky side bordering on too big, but it can be cinched with the ribbon in the middle. I have seriously thought about removing that ribbon because I'm just not sure about it (As you can see, my bow tying skills are also a bit off as well...). If removed the ribbon would also be a pain to thread back through the fabric "loop" that contains it. I always enjoy everyone's feedback on my outfits, so definitely tell me what you think about this one!

In the previous post, Pamela from the awesome blog Call Me Ishmael asked a question: how long does it take wifey to do your hair and make up every time you take pictures and post? The answer is that it really depends. I normally wear my hair in a ponytail, and if I'm changing in the afternoon or evening and just going to wear one outfit and stay in, I'll just brush out my hair, but I do play around sometimes and try to fix my hair myself. I really want to be able to do these things for myself. (I also definitely intend to corner my stylist next time I get my hair cut and beg for lessons!) Likewise with the makeup. I want to learn how to do it myself. But most of the time for pictures I just brush out my hair and don't wear makeup (including the pictures in this post).

If we're going to go out though, I usually ask my wife to do my hair and makeup since she does a much better job than I do. I hope to get to the point where I feel comfortable doing it myself when I go out, but on the other hand, my wife does enjoy playing with makeup, so its not too much of a struggle to get her to help out there.

For makeup it normally takes about 15 minutes total. I start by shaving, and that takes maybe 5 minutes and then I take a break to let my face air dry. I should add that recently I have also experimented with using an epilator on my beard as well, but I still have to shave to get the hairs it misses. Fortunately, this experiment with hair removal went better than my last big adventure, I won't say its the most pleasant thing I've done though, but strangely enough it seems to irritate my face less than shaving (especially past the initial usage). I think I must have fairly sensitive skin. Anyway, with that done, we apply concealer for red spots/beard coverage, then use a loose powder foundation, blush, eye liner, eye shadow, mascara, and lip gloss. I could probably get away with less work on facial hair removal if I would use a heavier coverage foundation, but I don't really like any of the ones we've tried, and its been really difficult to match my skin tone on the heavier coverage too.

Hair takes a lot longer. Usually about an hour I think. I have fine, thick, straight hair, so it tends to take some work to get it to hold a curl. The last time my wife curled it in layers and used a spray gel before curling, and then hairsprayed it all when she was done. Its been tricky for my wife to figure out how to style my hair since her hair has a lot more natural curl.

And while this is not exactly what was asked, I do think I should add that the real time sink in getting ready is hair removal. Shaving my legs, chest, face, and armpits, plus using the epilator and tweezing just takes a while. I probably spend 4-6 hours a week on hair removal. So to go out for the evening like this post, I probably spend about 2 hours before getting ready, with my wife helping for about half of that time.

And of course my beautiful wife took the pictures for this post.